(8/26/11)

Kiddo!

It’s been a bit of time.

I got you some nice things recently. I think we’re going with a Dr. Seuss theme. I figure we can educate you early on and teach you all your colors too! I promise not to make it corny and typical. I also don’t plan on making gender specific, because even though I’m going to find out what you are, I don’t want all pink, or all blue, or…you know. That drama.

Anyways.

I’ve had a hard time with you little peanut.

First, physically….let’s just say…if you’re your mother’s kid you’ll have lots of gas. Just like my dad. But I didn’t grow up in his belly…so not sure how that one worked out.

I’ve got two more weeks ’til this trimester is over and then everyone tells me that I’ll snap right out of it and we’ll have some renewed energy. But you are really sapping me buddy. Today I was rather vomity at work, and constipated. Now I’m just sitting at home watching movies and feeling gross.

I’ve also been dealing with some heart issues kiddo. I’ve been thinking of not sharing them vocally with anyone, even your sweet Daddy because I don’t want you to feel hurt, or less loved, or unwanted. You’re simply unexpected. So when unexpected things happen it throws my plans all for a mess.

I do pray that you have your Daddy’s flexibility and faith. He’s much better at that than I am and can adjust quickly. It takes me a little time. I have to figure out how to reconcile the thoughts and ideas I had and fit you in. God knows what he’s doing, and I totally believe that once you’re here, once I meet you and hold you and snuggle you and smell you, I’ll know that you were always meant to be and you always made sense for this time of our lives.

I love you baby. Be patient with me.

Momma.